S3 169. Bad Father
Ava approached Jeremy hesitantly. The man still had his elbows on his knees, bowed while massaging his
temples. Occasionally, his
shoulders seemed to rise, pressed by the tightness of his chest. Ava
couldn't bear to see it.
“Jeremy,” she called softly. When the man glanced out of the corner of his eye, she continued, “Would you like
Jeremy shook his head slightly. “I'm fine, Ava. Just need tto think. You just accompany the others at the
dinner table. I'll catch up soon.”
While Jeremy nodded, trying to reassure her, Ava was lost in thought. After a short consideration, she sat on the
sbench.
“I won't be noisy. Just pretend I'm not here. You can continue thinking. Ava lowered her head, not wanting to
make Jeremy feel intimidated.
However, Jeremy's sad gaze was still fixed on Ava. Only after a long sigh did he change his sight-back to the
ultrasound image in his
hand.
“Did you know?” Jeremy's voice broke the silence. Ava glanced without turning her head.
“When | was still living in an orphanage, | often thought. | often wondered. Why did my mother leave me? Where
are the other children’s parents? Were they also abandoned likeor are their parents dead?”
Ava didn’t answer. She let Jeremy express his emotions.
“The end of every reflection was always the same. We're just unlucky because we have bad parents, selfish
parents, or irresponsible
parents.”
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Jeremy's voice grew quieter. He wasn’t really looking at Ava now. His eyes seemed to be blocked by an invisible
partition in the air.
“Sometimes, | tried to see from another perspective. What if our parents were actually less fortunate? They
could have been forced to throw us away. They might have suffered as much as we did.”
Jeremy paused again, adding a sad impression to the dim light of the garden lamps.
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“But then, | refuted my thoughts again. No matter how bad their condition was, they shouldn't abandon their
children. How could they
trust someone else more than themselves to take care of their
children?”
Suddenly, Jeremy let out a quick sigh. The sound was like a heartbreaking laugh.
“So in conclusion, we were abandoned because our parents were evil. That's what | believed until finally | was
too tired to think about it.”
Folding his lips inward, Jeremy raised and lowered the paper in his hand. The light from his eyes depicted pain.
“Now, I've becone of them-a bad parent. Even worse. | had no idea that my carelessness could be a disaster
for my own child.”
Ava shook her head faintly. Her hand reached out, touching her husband’s arm. “You're not evil, Jer. You didn’t
even know the ba existed. What happened between you was also against your will, right? So don’t equate your
current case with your parents’ case. It different.”
“But | was just like them. | abandoned my child. | didn’t do anything when he was aborted.”
Ava looked at Jeremy closely. Her lips no longer spoke. She knew that Jeremy didn’t need comfort.
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“Okay,” she whispered before taking a deep breath, “I admit, | don’t understand your feelings. | don’t know what
it’s like to lose a child. I don’t know what it’s like to lose something I've never held.”
While Jeremy was pensive, Ava took the ultrasound images. With teary eyes, she stroked the white spot there.
“I just don’t want you to punish yourself for a mistake that can’t be changed. And | think he thinks the same
way.”
Blinking gently, Ava looked at Jeremy closely.
“Just like how you forgive your mother, he will also forgive you. | believe every baby sent into the world has a
mission to put a smile on their parents’ faces. If you are too sad, he might feel guilty.”
“He hasn't had the chance to see the world, Ava. He doesn’t know who his father is. He can’t possibly have
feelings like that. What he does is to hate me.”
“Do Louis and Emily hate Frank?” Ava raised an eyebrow.
Jeremy blinked. He remembered how the two toddlers once missed their father. Before he could reply, another
voice was heard.
“Ava is right, Uncle.”
Jeremy glanced at the little girl who had been standing on the other side for stime.
“Even though Louis and | didn’t know who Daddy was, we always missed Daddy. Every night, | always prayed
that Daddy would be happy.”
Louis nodded slightly. “Yes,too. Even though | was confused and angry because Daddy left us, I still loved
him. | also hoped Daddy was always happy.”
Jeremy's breath hitched. A strange feeling spread to all corners of his
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heart.
“Weren't you guys angry that Frank failed to protect you?”
Louis furrowed his brows deeper. “I never thought so. | know Daddy must have tried his best.”
Emily nodded, supporting Louis’ statement. A second later, she
stepped forward, patting Jeremy’s hand.
“Uncle, don’t be sad anymore. Instead of crying, you better pray that your baby will be happy in heaven.”
“And you don’t need to worry, Uncle,” Louis continued. “Grandpa Rowan must be taking good care of him there.
They are probably playing and laughing together.”
Emily nodded again. “Besides, if you're sad, this little baby will be sad too.” She stroked Ava’s stomach. “Doctor
Wela said, baby shouldn't be stressed. Otherwise, his growth will be stunted.”
Jeremy's furrowed brows changed meaning. He felt he just got a slap on his face. Emily was right. He couldn't be
selfish. There was still- another baby who needed his attention.
“Do you think the baby in heaven will be jealous if | love this baby?” Jeremy stroked Ava’s stomach with a wry
smile.
“I don’t think so,” Louis shook his head without thinking.
“Yeah, | don’t think so either. Mommy said, fairness doesn’t mean giving the samount, but something that
suits your needs. baby in heaven only needs prayers, while this baby needs your
attention.”
“In fact, if you keep being sad, it's not fair for this baby,” Louis added.
Slowly, the corners of Jeremy’s lips lifted. The burden in his heart was reduced a lot. “Thank you, Emily, Louis.”
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“Are you
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not sad anymore?” Louis tilted his head.
Still, but I already know how to handle it.”
A second later, Jeremy moved closer to Ava and kissed her temple.
“I'm sorry if | ruined our special day. And sorry if | made you feel uncomfortable. | hope you don’t misunderstand.
I'm sad not because of Sophia. | don’t have feelings for her. I'm sad because of the child she aborted.”
Ava shook her head faintly. “No problem. | can understand. Sophia deliberately destroyed the happiness and
trust between us. | will not fall for her instigation. Now, do you still need tto be alone?”
Jeremy glanced at the twins. They were blinking waiting for the answer. “You said you had prepared something
for tonight?”
The twins nodded vigorously.
“Yes, we have prepared a surprise.
“Do you want to see it now, Uncle? But Mommy said we can only show it after eating.”
Jeremy widened his smile. After putting the ultrasound results in his pocket, along with a letter from Rowan, he
got up from the bench. Let's go to the dining table. Let's continue partying.”
Louis threw up his fists and ran. “Woohoo! Uncle Jeremy isn’t
anymore.”
Emily gasped at the sight. “Louis, wait for me!” She also move little legs, chasing her brother.
Jeremy watched the two toddlers with teary eyes. His expression w hard to describe.
“Jeremy,” Ava whispered, “you don’t have to deny your feelings. It's
okay if you're still sad. You just need to stop blaming yourself.”
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Jeremy glanced and shook his head faintly. “I just admitted that I'm still sad. I'm not denying it, Ava. It's just that
| want to try to keep going. There’s no point inslumping in silence, right?”
Ava cupped Jeremy's cheek and kissed his forehead. “I am proud of you.”
too. Thank you for being willing to understand me.”
Ava nodded. Taking Jeremy’s hand, she said, “Now, let's get together with the others. The twins can’t wait to
show off their surprise.”
Jeremy nodded with a small smile.
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